Last week Friday was a Reality Check...for one it was the last day of work for a summer youth employee(at my charity semi-job) who I grew to love and appreciate. In remembrance of his departure and the wonderful work he performed, the office decided to throw him a pizza party. The party was delightful. We enjoyed Pizza and Salad while all attention was on Isaiah. One of the questions the heads of the department asked him was what he was going to do with his life and/or future and he responded "I want to go to Penn State like Kydee...to study medicine." I was honored and so happy that my conversations with him could lead him to such a decision but I didn't expect the attention to be turned to me. Next thing I knew a swarm of questions were being asked all at once..."So you went to Penn State" " When did you graduate?" "What was your major" "What are you going to do with the rest of your life" When I answered the questions with confidence (being so used to this type of interrogation process by now) exclaiming that I planned on going to law school and am currently filling out applications during this break from school, I was approached by the big dog. A beautiful brown face just like mine with shaven gray hair and an ostentatious air about her, who was the second in charge in the department. She went on to say "Which school are you trying to get into" My response was "Right now I don't know but I am reaching for Georgetown in D.C" the following is pretty much the dialogue from that point on:
Her: Oh wow Georgetown is a pretty hard school to get into, very competitive, what was your GPA
Me: (face blushes from embarrassment of the boldness of that question and I embellish my gpa of course, just to round it hehe) 3.4
Her: You do know they start from 4.0
Me: Ummm
Her: you better have a hell of an application and a lot of other things going for you because that school is competitive and a lot of people apply with higher gpas
Me: UMMM...if I was to have that mentality i would remain stagnant and stuck and afraid to apply for anything...all law schools are competitive so ummm...
Her: well can you at least write
ME: Im a great writer...but I know I can get into this school despite what you think
Her: ok whatever you say
Pretty much after that you could cut the tension in the room with a knife. I was shocked and stunned that this woman had the audacity to call me out in front of a room full of people to tell me I couldn't follow my dreams and go off to a school that I really wanted to go to because of my GPA. Who did she think she was? To make matters worst this woman, a black woman just like me chose to knock me down as opposed to encouraging me and offering her help or blessings. She's older so I know she been through a lot and she knows how it is to be a black woman in society yet she chose the route to hate on a younger black female than to encourage her. I was disgusted. Clem (my semi-boss) called me into his office because he was disgusted as well. He noticed how droopy my cheeks were (my face reveals all my feelings) and told me "Kydee you have to understand that you are a threat! Your young, gorgeous, fresh faced and smarter than i don't know what...you have the whole world at your fingertips don't get discouraged" I revealed my anger to him and as a black man he completely understood; we went on to discuss the state of the African American race and why we don't just support each other but constantly feel the need to compete against each other like animals. After I left the office, I went to meet my mom and brother so we could see "The Help"
The Help was heaven sent. It not only exposed the state of the African American community in the Jim Crow South, but the sisterhood and bond between our community that was necessary in order to survive such hardship. Watching that movie I felt the pain of our race during that time, the degradation and the treatment as second class citizens or even worst animals was really hard to watch. However the beauty of the movie was the sisterhood between Aibileen and Minny who had a laugh to prevent from crying mentality that so many blacks also had to cope with their situation. I loved the support that they gave to one another and after watching this film, my faith was restored. Instead of being mad at this woman who tried to shoot my dreams down, I decided I would just pray for her because the unhappiness she has within herself could have easily been passed on to me but I won't allow it. I used her negativity from that day to make a promise to myself that i would never get stuck in a job or a situation that I am so unhappy with that I couldn't possibly be happy for someone else. I'm sure I am going to have to deal with worst people than her in this world that we live in. Reality Check: I am officially in the real world.
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